Saturday, 21 September 2013

Autumn Blessings ...


A Blessed Mabon to you and yours. The Wheel of the Year is turning once again and the earth is settling down to snooze her way through to Spring.  

Gorgeous 'Autumn Goddess' picture sourced from Google but sadly no credit
given to the artist/creator.  Please let me know if you know :)
It has been a stunningly beautiful day today.  Today 'should' have been our wedding day.  Some of you may remember that we had booked a venue some 18 months ago and plans were being made.  Today was to be the day.  Unfortunately, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow or a lottery win did not materialise and, realising that we could not put ourselves under so much financial pressure, we had to cancel.

I've felt a little subdued today; having a bit of a weep here and there.  Not through any sense of loss because nothing has changed at all; but in frustration and exasperation I guess.   The man has been amazingly understanding as usual, managing to say just the right things (which made me cry more) and being his usual loving and caring self.  As today draws to a close I know that I am blessed. I know that the ceremony will happen at some point, and it is not the "be all and end all".  That may be the case for many people; some may view the signing of a bit of paper archaic and unnecessary - but it is MY be all and end all right now.  I never thought that I would ever want to marry again but having found the missing piece of my jigsaw then something changed.  We know that we will make it happen and that our big day will be everything we ever wanted it to be,  but I'm strangely glad that today is done.  I'm cross with myself that I've felt so maudlin on such a beautiful day - its probably not helped by bloody hormones.  But its done.

All week long I have been seeing tiny pure white feathers in random places.  Like little markers of comfort and encouragement.  I never pick them up - just look at them and smile and know that they're there for a reason.

Time to breathe.   Summon some inner strength.    Be grateful for all that I am blessed with.   Time to (carry on) Be(ing)  happy, because although I am not wealthy in a monetary sense, I am richer than I ever thought possible.

Love and light, my friends, Love and light. xxx


9 comments:

  1. Still it is better to be happy without the piece of paper than miserable with it as so many are.

    It was my 40 something wedding anniversary this week but I felt sad with my hubby being in care with dementia, Still I am lucky as, like you I have a new man in my life. Makes all the difference especially when my hubby fails to recognise me.

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    1. Susan your first sentence is so poignant and completely true, thank you. It must be very difficult for you in the circumstances but you must now make time for you too. Good luck with the new relationship xx

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  2. It'll happen! My own wedding (in Gibraltar) cost about £10, and the honeymoon (before the wedding) in Tangier cost maybe £50. Travel costs added about another £100. It was BLOODY MARVELLOUS!

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  3. Big hug for you, lovely girl x

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  4. It will happen, you just have to keep believing and smiling at the white feathers.

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    1. Thank you - I know it will if we want it badly enough. Time to 'woman' up!! x

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  5. Aw, your day will come chuck, and it will be worth the wait!

    Autumn greetings to you

    Love Claire xxx

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